Max players per Server

How many players can be simultaneously in the same server without lag with spongeforge
with server
CPU : Intel Xeon E5-2687Wv4 - 12c/24t - 3 GHz/3,5 GHz
RAM : 256Go DDR4 ECC 2133 MHz

Good amount of RAM.
How many / which mods do you use?

One, if the player wants to lag the server, without a modlist this is useless. And even then it depends on what people do.

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I have 3 mods 1 mod make by me and custom npc , storage drawer

A comparable question would be: How long is a piece of string?

For a very crude guesstimate, with vanilla (un-modded) Minecraft, you can usually get away with ~10 players per GB. It depends very much on what they are doing - for example, if they are all flying at top speed in divergent directions creating new terrain, the impact-per-player will be a lot higher than if they all sat in the same room chatting. Nearby redstone automation, heavily built up areas, and mob farms in loaded chunks can all add significant lag; it depends on where the players are and what they’re doing. Impact on the CPU is usually harder than that on the RAM (but that is a rather meaty CPU you have there, it should cope).

When you start adding mods, a common rule of thumb is to at least double the RAM per player, so maybe 5 per GB. Mods can add demands on data storage and retrieval, and often run many other background tasks that vanilla doesn’t. This is also where Sponge’s server optimisations come into their own, as you can start tweaking things like entity-activation ranges, mob limits, tile-entity-activation ranges, etc.

There are a few other things that can help reduce player impact, such as setting a world border and pregenerating the world within those limits, and plugins to deal with item/boat/minecart removal. So you really have to discover for yourself how much impact there is per-player.