Sponge Encyclopedia of Programming Jokes

#1

Because we all need a place where we can grab jokes from when coding.

I’ll start:
http://jackgraves.files.wordpress.com/2013/04/devhumor-com_programs.jpg

Printf("Please spam all developer jokes here.");
Greatest Programming Jokes
#2

My fav

eb94fb1b31e054cb.png516×654

#3

I am not a programmer but the one on the right annoys me for some reason… I r confuzzed.(2 types of people one.)

#4

That’s probably why the bottom says ‘Programmers will know’. :smile:

#5

My favourite one:

A programmer walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 1.00000000000003123939 root beers. Bartender says, “I’ll have to charge you extra, that’s a root beer float.” Programmer says, “Better make it a double.”

Next favourite:

A programmer had a problem. He thought to himself, “I know, I’ll solve it with threads!”. has Now problems. two he

Third:

I’d tell you a UDP joke but I’m not sure you’d get it.

#6

I moved 8 posts to an existing topic: Code Styling. What do you prefer?

#15

I quite like the one:

There are only two hard things in Computer Science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off by one errors.

#16

Especially that.
For me it is extra hard because my first language is German.

#17

Sometimes I put a bunch of words and variable names into a random picker and then use that :stuck_out_tongue:

#18

I know this one is very common, but it’s so true:

#19

I found this accidently: http://codecrap.com/content/400/.
I wish it was a joke ;-;.

long long time; //ago in a galaxy far away...
#20

Looks like a decompiled switch statement.

#21

That code doesn’t even require a switch. He should use == with the block he wants to check. Not check all the blocks in the game.

#22

I’d like to hear the UDP joke.

#23

See also What was the strangest coding standard rule that you were forced to follow?

I’d like to hear the UDP joke.

you already did

#24

facepalm
Now I feel dumb.

#25

Those are rather spectacular. Thanks for the chuckle.

#26

A programmer is simply a mechanism for turning caffeine into code.

And the classic…

Why do Java programmers wear glasses?
They can’t C

#27

Why do Java programmers wear glasses?
The can’t C

The version I heard was

Why do Java programmers wear glasses?
So they can C# (see sharp)

#28

Sorry for the languge in this one